Hardboiled Wonderland and The End of the World

Be honest with yourself, and with everyone else as well. There are some things you like and other things you dislike, and that's just fine.

Be fully accepting of yourself, and of others as well. You are who you are, with your dreams and passions, preferences and interests, and each person is delightfully unique.

What you run from or hide from or seek to deny, grows bigger and more influential as a result. By getting things out in the open, by seeing them for what they truly are, you become free of their control.

You are where you are and life is the way it is. The more completely you accept it, the more power you have to do something about it.

This moment carries enormous opportunity. No positive purpose is served by fighting against it.

Instead, accept what is, the way you are, the way you feel, and the things that life has brought to you. Then you can make the very most of it all.

-- Ralph Marston

Few weeks ago I read two articles written by my friend on his blog site, I immediately thought of something that happened to me. Actually it’s something I heard while I was having physio treatment....

At the time the physiotherapist, Edward, had finished working on my problems, so I was lying on the bed with a hot pack on my shoulder.  During this time, he usually he goes off to help another patient to keep him busy.

The clinic is moderate in size, so the beds are only separated by curtains.  So whether it was by accident or not, I always hear conversations that other patients have with Ed. These are usally small talk about everyday stuff, but on that day, a particular conversation stuck with me……

The voice coming from the other bed sounded deep, rustic, a voice that has seen the ups and downs of life, I would say he sounded like a 60 year old Australian men.  It seems to me that he has been coming for treatment for the past few weeks so Ed went straight to ask about the men's shoulder problem.

The men laughed helplessly and replied " Still the same, what can you do when you are getting old?"

Ed was honest enough and agreed with the old men, so the only suggestion he gave was to rest more and work less.  “that is the only thing that will help him to manage the "50's shoulder" problem,” he said.  Immediately he got on with the treatment, and usual the small talk continued.

The old men seemed to have gotten to know the physio well from his previous visits, so when he asked about the new born baby that Edward had recently, both became very enthusiastic talking about their sons.

Edward's son was actually just born yesterday and the little boy is waiting for his grandfather to give him a name.  By contrast, the old men's son has already grown up, moved out and has a family of his own.

There are other details that I won't reiterate, below is the part left me thinking:

ED:     “ Is your son's house also finished?” 

 

Old Men:  “Oh yah. Pretty soon I hope.  I have been going over to help him with the renovation.  He is usually tired from work every day.  If he only works on the house during the weekend it would too way too long.”

 

ED:  “Remember your shoulder problem? You shouldn’t really work you know”

 

Old Men:  “I know, but what can you do?  No matter how old your childrens get, they are still your children. Although he has wife and kids, a family of his own, he is still my son.  He told me that he doesn’t need my help. He knows I am getting old and I have a crook shoulder. But you know, you just can’t say no to your own children.  I just can’t say to him, “ No, I can’t,   My shoulders can’t handle it,  I can’t help you” “

He stopped for a moment, gathering his thoughts.  At this point I was thinking about what what my parents have done for me all these years.  Needless to say I was really moved by what the man has said so far. Ed was quiet too, concentrating and listening, perhaps thinking about what his parents has done for him, and even more that he is a dad himself.

But it was what he said next that was engraved deep into my heart.  The man continued :

“This is what parents do. They always try to help their children as much as possible.  I just want to do the same for my son. As long as these old arms can still move, I want to help him as much as I can. And you know, just hope that one day, he does the same for his children.”

 

When I heard the last sentence, I was really moved beyond words.  I know deep in my heart that my parents has already given me so much and I know they never ask for anything in return. 

But when I heard those words being spoken by someone, a stranger, obviously under no pretences, I finally understood that parents’ love is far greater than what children will ever know. 

Parents don’t ask anything in return, they just hope for the best for their children.

They hope their children have a good family.  And they hope their children can be good parents too.

In all honesty, I was also a little surprised at the beginning.  But I didn’t understand why I reacted that way.  After thinking about it later, I understood why that was the case,

It was because that I had always thought only in traditional Chinese culture,  like the one that I was bought up in, that values of family and parenting still so deep and profound even  for the children that has grown up.

And I was wrong.

Regardless of nationality, culture, religion and background, even though parents might have show their love in different ways, In their eyes, as long as their children needs help,  they will also do their best to help without self-preservation.  Because children, are always “children”. 

Uninvited you had to move into my house.

Although you were always quiet and

Although i find you cute, but nevertheless it was never meant to be.

It is just simlply impossible we can llive under the same roof.

You eat, you sleep and you do your thing,

without asking and any thankyou

you were never welcomed,

in my peaceful little sanctury.

You stared at me when i was watching a dvd,

and lucky you my friend had called in time

but this time you weren't this lucky to get away

oh No!

Don't get me wrong, i don't have anything against you

but when i got you by your tail,  i had a certain sastifaction.

I am really sorry, but it had to be done...

so farewell, my unwelcomed guest,

and Rest In Peace,

you little mouse!